just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Randomize
