People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
