Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Randomize
