ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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