I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
