this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
