I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize