Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
