I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
we're so committed to being not committed
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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