1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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