I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
