it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize