you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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