I'm really into asian looking animals
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
soo... how was my night?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
