Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
