It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize