Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize