Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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