8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
