dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize