Do you still have your period?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Randomize
