There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize