I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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