I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Randomize