If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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