Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Randomize