bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I am midnight drunk by noon
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize