We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
