He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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