you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
