Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Dignity is for republicans.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize