Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I need to sanitize my soul.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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