She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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