dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
