i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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