We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
