He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
