I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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