If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
