Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
