I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
