worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Rumble strips road head = magical
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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