...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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