new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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