How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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