Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
