did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
