ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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