Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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