anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
